Everything is completely surreal!! We're kinda on autopilot!! Im so glad we are so close cos we are talking loads and getting things sorted exactly the way dad wanted them!! We've organised all the funeral and everything! Its not until 3 weeks, which is really crap because i have to go back to Ireland for a week then come back! :( Its strange but half of me is looking forward to it because it is going to be our way of showing just how much he meant to us and there are going to be lots of friends there that we havent seen for ages!!
We're having feelings in waves. One minute we're in fits of laughter thinking about things that we've done and the way Dad was, then the next minute we're crying because something we think about makes us sad!! Its craziness!! It still hasnt really sunk in that my dad is never coming back!! The thing is i may not have dad here physically here but i still have a dad and i know he's here with me!!
We went shopping today for clothes for dads funeral. It was so hard! My mum found it really hard! The first shop we went into was the last place dad went shopping in... He lost loadsa weight so they went shopping to get him some new clothes. He was so proud when he found stuff to fit him. So today it upset my mum, knowing he wasnt ever going to do that again! :( We all got cool clothes.... We're wearing black but we're not being all traditional and sad. My nan died in October and i wore a black hat to cover my pink hair and my dad told me not to wear it because i should just be who i am and it isnt disrespectful because its just me!! So even though im wearing black to dads funeral they are going to be clothes that i'd normally wear. Thats what dad wanted!
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